Melody Beattie Love Quotes and Sayings
#1 The Lessons of Love: Rediscovering Our Passion for Live When It All Seems Too Hard to Take, Harper Collins, 30 July 2013
1. “You don’t blast a heart open,” she said. “You coax and nurture it open, like the sun does to a rose.”
#2-5 The Language of Letting Go: Daily Meditations on Codependency, Simon and Schuster, 12 December 2009
2. The greatest gift we can bring to any relationship wherever we go is being who we are.
3. Loving ourselves may seem foreign, even foolish at times. People may accuse us of being selfish. We don’t have to believe them.
4. Embrace and love all of yourself—past, present, and future. Forgive yourself quickly and as often as necessary. Encourage yourself. Tell yourself good things about yourself.
5. People who love themselves are truly able to love others and let others love them. People who love themselves and hold themselves in high esteem are those who give the most, contribute the most, love the most.
#6 Journey to the Heart: Daily Meditations on the Path to Freeing Your Soul, Harper Collins, 30 April 2013
6. Self-love means loving and accepting yourself, your thoughts, beauty, emotions, your faults, imperfections, and flaws, your strengths, wit, wisdom, as well as your peculiar and unique way of seeing the world.
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7. Make what you do a labor of love. Then your work will truly touch and change the world in the way you desire.
Melody Beattie is the author of Codependent No More, published in 1987 by the Hazelden Foundation. The book was successful and influential within the self-help movement, selling over eight million copies and introducing the word codependent to the general public.
Following the success of Codependent No More, Beattie authored over a dozen other books, including Beyond Codependency and The Language of Letting Go. Her most recent book is Make Miracles in Forty Days: Turning What You Have Into What You Want, published in 2010. Several of her books have been published in other languages.
Sayings by Melody Beattie
#1-3 The Language of Letting Go: A Meditation Book and Journal for Daily Reflections, Hazelden Publishing, 31 January 2003
1. Control is an illusion, especially the kind of control we’ve been trying to exert. In fact, controlling gives other people, events, and diseases, such as alcoholism, control over us. Whatever we try to control does have control over us and our life.
2. We cannot change other people. It does not help others for us to get off balance. We do not lead others into the Light by stepping into the darkness with them.
3. Today, I will not wait for others to see and care; I will take responsibility for being aware of my pain and problems, and caring about myself.
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4. I trust so much in the power of the heart and the soul; I know that the answer to what we need to do next is in our own hearts. All we have to do is listen, then take that one step further and trust what we hear. We will be taught what we need to learn.
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5. Live your life from your heart. Share from your heart. And your story will touch and heal people’s souls.
#6-7 Melody Beattie 4 Title Bundle, Simon and Schuster, 13 July 2010
6. Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more.
7. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.
#8-9 The New Codependency: Help and Guidance for Today’s Generation, Simon and Schuster, 30 December 2008
8. When you let go of fear and the need to control, you’ll experience how mysterious, sacred, and interesting Life can be.
9. We can confuse love with dependency, manipulation, and neediness. None of those are love. Love is when we want other people to be who they are.
#10-15 Journey to the Heart: Daily Meditations on the Path to Freeing Your Soul, Harper Collins, 30 April 2013
10. Cherish the winter. Cherish its quietness, the time of going within to rest and heal. Cherish this time of preparation that must come before new life. Cherish the hope that lies beneath the snow.
11. Feel and release your fears. See how needless they are? See how they keep you from enjoying life? Unclench your hands. Don’t always look straight ahead. Experience. Adventure. Let yourself live.
12. Go on your own journey. Don’t let others hold you back; don’t hold them back. Don’t judge their journey, and don’t let them judge yours.
13. It’s good to go with the flow. But it’s better to go with what you know—what you know to be true for you. Trusting yourself is the ultimate lesson.
14. Joy is a choice—a deliberate, conscious choice. That choice is available to us each day. Our joy isn’t controlled by others or by outward circumstances. Joy comes from a deeper place, a place of security within ourselves.
15. Don’t wait for things to change. The change you’re waiting for will come from within you.
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16. Recovery is not about being right; it’s about allowing ourselves to be who we are and accepting others as they are.
#17 The Language of Letting Go: Daily Meditations on Codependency, Simon and Schuster, 12 December 2009
17. Believing that things happen too slowly or too quickly is an illusion. Timing is perfect.
#18 More Language of Letting Go: 366 New Daily Meditations, Simon and Schuster, 21 August 2009
18. Instead of fussing and worrying about how different you are, be grateful that you’re unique. Celebrate being you.
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19. Sometimes people behave in certain ways to provoke us to react in certain ways. If we stop reacting in these certain ways, we take all the fun out of it for them.
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20. When we’re surrounded by things that look impossible, making a simple choice to do something that’s possible is a powerful thing to do.
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21. It’s so easy to look around and notice what’s wrong. It takes practice to see what’s right.
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22. Real power comes when we stop holding others responsible for our pain, and we take responsibility for all our feelings.
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23. We can say what we need to say. We can gently, but assertively, speak our mind. We do not need to be judgmental, tactless, blaming or cruel when we speak our truths.
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24. If you can’t get peaceful about a decision, let it go. It’s not time to make it yet. Wait until your mind is consistent and your emotions are calm.
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25. Feel the pain when you have a loss. Feel the joy when you triumph. Then let go and continue to grow.
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26. Our source of happiness and well-being is not inside others; it’s inside us.
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27. Realizing that we can feel our emotions without being our emotions is liberating and healing.
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28. Today, I will wait if the way is not clear. I will trust that out of the chaos will come clarity.
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29. Learn to say whatever, but learn to say it with as much compassion and love as you can.
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30. Gratitude can turn a meal into a feast.
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31. We can accept our wonderful selves, with all our faults, foibles, strong points, weak points, feelings, thoughts, and everything else. It’s the best thing we’ve got going for us.
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32. I never know what the next lesson is going to be, because we’re not supposed to know – we’re supposed to trust ourselves to discover it.
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33. Acceptance is the magic that makes change possible. It is not forever, it is for the present moment.
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34. We can be honest with other people without being mean.
Unsourced Quotes by Melody Beattie
1. We decided that sooner or later you had to learn to live without almost everybody, at least for a while. Even people you didn’t think you could live without. Love always found itself again.
2. A man went to Istanbul, his first visit there. On his way to a business meeting, this man lost his way. He began raging at himself for getting lost, until a realization allowed him to transcend his ire. “How can I be lost? I’ve never been here before?
3. Change your perspective and enjoy the adventure. Let the child in you come out to play.
4. Other people may be there to help us, teach us, guide us along our path, but the lesson to be learned is always ours.
5. Like it or not, I was already learning that in the worst and darkest time, I would find specks of light, moments of joy. What I didn’t want to learn was the other, harsher lesson – that in life’s brightest moments there would also be unbearable pain.